College Application

Unusual is my middle name. I am quiet and sneaky. During my spare time, I stack sugar cubes and fly kites. My ancestors have come from Never Land, being distant cousins five times removed of Peter Pan himself. Flying was useful until my right hand was chopped off by the American soldiers in the Vietnam War. I have been the lucky winner in Lotto 649 three times. Coke is the ultimate soda. If you don't know me, you don't know that I personally have met the immense Shack O’Neill. If you don't know me, you don’t know that I can through a dart and hit the bulls eye 98.4 % of the time. If you don’t know me, you don’t know that I have many talents. This includes holding the Guinness world’s record for standing on my head, making the perfect peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and my personal favourite, whistling the exact tune of Beethoven’s commanding piece, the second movement from Symphony No. 7. I was successful in taking a multitude of nuns to a Justin Bieber concert. Just for the record, they are all now “beliebers.” I was successful in designing the Chinese flag. I was successful in baking my first pie with my bare hands. I am indolent. At exactly 1:05pm I take a nap; just after I play a round of crochet with the Prime Minister. When I ask for rain, it pours. When I ask for sun, it shines. When I ask for allowance, I’m told no. I am divinity. Everyone wants to be me because I am everything. But I have not yet attended college.